Dumbass moment of the day

I should keep a more regular recording of these moments.
Monday’s was “the bath” incident.
Tuesday’s was for sure, the Uke presentation.
Wednesday’s was falling over a bag in the common room.
Thursday’s was getting jammed in between the two doors in the toilets with my bass clarinet box. That was *NOT* fun.

And so ONTO TODAY’S! AND IT’S NOT EVEN 20 PAST 8 IN THE MORNING!
I was getting out of the car. Singing Mumford & Son’s “The Cave” and just being really happy about the day ahead really. Then BAMMMM! I knocked my glasses off. They stick out from my face a little bit, but not all that much to be a daily nuisance. All in all, my face must have been too near to the doorframe of the car, and yes, my glasses FLEW from my ears, from atop my nose and landed on the ground next to my feet. Thankfully, they did not land lens down, but just as you would expect glasses to be left on any other ordinary tableau or work surface, with the arms outstretched and underneath of lens just touching the surface. I kind of shouted “OH BALLS MY GLASSES” and Dad was like “OH NO, REALLY?” I just sort of huffed off because I realised how dumb a thing it was to have happened to me; I mean, I knocked my OWN GLASSES OFF BECAUSE MY FACE WAS TOO NEAR TO A DOOR. Bearing this in mind, I have done this many times in many different places, against many different frames (some frame on frame action, geddit? Hahahaha NOT FUNNY HAZE) and I am not exaggerating.

I guess this just highlights how many of these awkward and potentially life defining moments happen to me, well, daily! I really am just a magnet for all of these mayhem inducing moments, at least they seem traumatic and devastating to me. It bugs me that I know some people who act awkward to get attention. Me? Seriously, it just HAPPENS. I think it’s mainly because I’m a really bad judge of spatial awareness, and partially because I’m quite obnoxious, but those are just my interpretations. People might think that I act like this for a reason, and if they do, they can get stuffed after telling me so. Do you ever think that? That you just wish people would tell you *really* what they think of you? It’s one of those things that annoys me about myself, I want to learn more about myself from others, but in a way, I’m still scared that their truth will point out the things about myself that I don’t want to recognise, but I do want to learn from, or you know, improve upon. I don’t know, but it’s just one of those things where I just feel this URGE to learn more, and observe the way that people observe me somehow. Anyway, those people that *Act* awkward? Please, you’re not doing yourself any favours. It’s not an endearing attitude to adopt really, is it?
At the end of the day, people will like you and want to spend time with you for who you really are (well I HOPE they do!) and if that someone is NOT NATURALLY AWKWARD, THEN THEY NEED A REALITY CHECK. I happen to be naturally awkward, obnoxious and sometimes rather, you know, frank. My friends accept that that is who I am, and I hope they like it. Not all of the time, but they understand.

I’m going for a meal with all of the people going on our Paris concert tour (in June) tonight. I’ve ordered a 12” pizza. Man, watching me plough through the WHOLE MOTHERLICKING PIZZA is going to be a spectacle. Not to mention awkward.

Tatty bye,
Haze